Meanwhile Dase walked with uncertain steps when she left the house she regarded as her empire for seven years. When she handed the spare keys of the entrance and exit doors to Eto it appeared her life ended. The house for all she knew welcomed no other girl from the day Eto moved in. She enjoyed sole rights and accepted to be described as a monitor lizard.
As she walked towards the SUV Lemmy moved to the side where he opened the door to the driver’s seat.
Dase thought he would walk back and open the door of the passenger seat for her as Eto used to do. She felt hurt and prayed Eto missed the brief drama. If he saw it, he would let go a mischievous smile in which one side of his upper lip curved upwards. Dase opened the door by herself and hopped in.
“How did it go?” Lemmy asked.
“Strange. No tears, no emotions. He prayed for me and wished me well.”
“True?”
“Yes.”
“I thought he would wish you evil and in all probability beat you.”
“No. Violence at any level has no place in his constitution. Once upon a time he said because God has in no measure destroyed him after the work done on him he cannot destroy anyone he has developed if the person walks out on him. The Almighty builds billions of human beings and watches them walk into the arms the King of Darkness or claim they were self-made and should be free from the shackles of religion.
Also Read:
- Redefining the cultural essence of Yoruba kingship, by Remi Ladigbolu
- Why some gospel artistes left Christ Embassy — Oyakhilome
- Appeal Court sets date for hearing in N579b claim by Kashamu’s firm
- Nkem Owoh at 70: He is Enugu’s precious gift to the world — Mbah
- Celebrating a Legacy: Dr. Aina marks his 70th birthday in grand style
“Free thinkers.”
“Yes. Honey, Eto made me what I will be for you tomorrow. I feel sad I have to walk out on him when he needs me.”
“Sorry. We can liken life to a relay race. You run one lap and hand over the baton to another runner.”
“Which means you will hand me to someone else in the future?”
“Marriages are forever.”
Lemmy turned the key to switch on the ignition and the engine came to life. To Dase, the sound of the engine represented new life coming through. As the elegant SUV rolled with grace from the frontage of her former kingdom, Dase felt strong urge to take one last look at the house which would have been hers for keeps if she married Eto. A modest bungalow but comfortable inside, she held a spare key to the two entrances, one in front and one behind from the day Eto packed into it. She used to go there whenever she wanted or he requested her presence. But all through the period of their relationship she left no clothes or any other personal belongings in the building. Eto noted and commented on it for it meant she saw herself as someone in transit and it came to pass.
As Dase reclined on the head rest she thought about one of the things Eto said. She bought nothing for him or the house throughout the tenure of their relationship. This made her feel uncertain whether anything would remind Eto of their relationship. But she knew memories of great moments, ugly incidents including their disagreements which were resolved within twenty-four hours, and trying times all of which coalesced into a dynamic in a seven-year relationship would likely be the best in her life.
Lemmy said nothing as he navigated the busy roads of the city. He allowed Dase to digest and absorb the reality of her new circumstance. Dase felt thankful for his silence for some time but felt a conversation would have helped her. She squirmed, sat up, cleared her throat, and spoke.
“You are quiet,” she said.
“I thought discussion would be a distraction.”
“Under the situation distraction can prove useful.”
“Alright. First, permit my curiosity. Why were you reluctant to enter the car? Did you consider a change of mind?”
“No.”
“Why did you drag your feet?”
“I waited for you to open the door of the car for me.”
“Oh, sorry. Many things to learn.”
“A gentleman should open the door of a car for his lady.”
“All ladies?”
“I said his lady.” Lemmy nodded. “Or are you uncertain I deserve such status?”
“A sad statement. I respect you and you know it.”
“Find a way to demonstrate what you think and feel.”
“I stand corrected.” Dase lapsed into silence but Lemmy continued. “I want to believe the guy you just abandoned used to open the door of a car for you.”
“I dislike the word abandoned. I left him for you and I feel uncomfortable about it.”
“Unintentional.”
“To him, I took priority in everything from money to the bedroom.”
“But if I may ask, why would you leave such a man?”
“You think I did something wrong?”
“I worry about being able to be as good. And please avoid fighting back when a simple answer would suffice for a simple question. Why should you leave a man who has treated you like a queen for another man whose orientation and world view you are uncertain of?”
“If you are uncertain as to how I should be treated maybe you should sign up for tutorials.”
“I thought you would say I should take you back to him.”
“Sounds sarcastic.”
“Our relationship has only seen daybreak. We cannot quarrel but permit me to wonder why you should leave certainty for uncertainty.”
“I cannot believe this! May be you can turn and take me back to certainty?” Lemmy took a roundabout twice but at low speed. Dase showed surprise and looked at him for an answer.
“Why did you go round twice?”
“To kill time. By the time we are home the burden on you should be lighter.”
When he switched on the radio a voice concluded a statement with the words, “…Leaving certainty for uncertainty.” Tears rolled without effort down Dase’s cheeks. Lemmy said something to re-assure and reduce the dissonance in her but when a song reeled out the word ‘calabash’ she wailed. Lemmy left the road, switched off the engine, held her, and looked into her tear-drenched face.
“He said something about calabash being turned against me in my village. Lemmy, has someone turned calabash against me?”
“Do you have someone in mind?”
“You for instance.”
“Go diabolic? Why would I? We are in love, simple.”
“I have some worries. We face an unreal and surreal situation. I have left substance to chase shadow. I have left the known to the unknown.”
“Let us take the last one. To leave the known to the unknown marks the substance of faith and life itself. Scientists move from the known to the unknown as do philosophers. We will live in bliss because the unknown has substance and in fact, you have the case of a new book which you can determine the opening chapter and I have no doubt, the last lines.”
“What about the calabash?”
“I consider the concept of calabash archaic. Where I come from we have no reason to turn calabashes. There are more modern things to do,” Lemmy said with a smile. Dase looked into his eyes but failed to read anything and his smile appeared to reach halfway into his soul. And, she felt the idea of modern calabash must have a hidden meaning.
“What would modern calabash be?”
“Many things. Your guy I guess operates in the old school. I am in the new school.”
“The concept of yahoo boys has gained currency.”
“I take exception to such insinuation. You know my family. My primogenitors built wealth in about a century.”
“Fate, or I hope Providence has taken over,” she said to herself as Lemmy jerked the car forward.
She blocked her mind to what will become of Eto after her sudden exit. Whenever they were away from each other they spoke at least five times a day on phone. She tried to block the thoughts of who would listen to him reel out the failures of the day or who would shout for joy as he mentioned the victories of the day. Who, she wondered, will henceforth listen to his plans big and small, realistic and unrealistic, the beautiful and the bizarre? Who would tell him to avoid a particular plan or to approach an issue in a different way?
She attempted with little success to block the thought of who would quarrel with him and if he finds one and whether the girl would melt like butter with one sentence from him. Who would be Eto’s confidant, lover, adviser, mother, and friend? Who would henceforth read his emotional disposition just by listening to the way he answers a telephone call? In her case, would Lemmy be able to read her emotional state one hundred kilometers away?
Dase recalled an occasion they travelled and he lost his mobile phone. Just one telephone number registered in his brain – hers. The only bank account details he knew offhand happened to be hers. He gave her the personal identification numbers (PIN) of all his active bank accounts. When he once asked her whether his actions were normal because the things he did were reserved for most trusted wives, she answered: “I am your sole and most trusted wife. Regard change of name as when rather than if it will happen.”
Eto ran his life as a one-woman man more so she believed and insisted on “exclusivity” in their relationship. Against conventional wisdom he placed all of his eggs despite the delicate nature of the decision.
Her heart began to race out of control as guilt feelings swirled like an eddy in her system. She felt her breath rise and go short while her head vibrated as if dry maize seeds were being pounded in a mortar on her head. She felt an urge to jump out of the car and run back to a man she knew she experiences incredible hurt at the moment. As the tension built up she wondered about her sanity.
Lemmy increased speed when the turbulence in her inner being became uncontrollable. Dase groped for the lever which opens the door and fumbled with it. Lemmy read her mind, stamped on the brakes, and left the road.
“Get hold of yourself will you?”
“What have I done? What have I done?” Dase screamed at Lemmy in horror.
“Nothing extraordinary. Just get yourself together,” he said.
“I am consumed by guilt mixed with intense fear. He may hurt himself. I know him.”
“You underrate the human spirit dear girl. He will pull through while you hurt yourself. Any mature person should be able to contain emotional pain and move on with life. If he failed to prepare himself this possibility, he should blame himself.”
“Food for thought,” Dase sighed and tilted the seat backwards, relaxed, and continued to sob. Lemmy switched on the ignition and eased the car back to the road but at a slow pace. He continued to look at the prone figure by him as he drove. No one needed to tell him an emotional wreck sat next to him with the need for careful management.
By and large the questions Dase knew would torment her for the rest of her life without Eto were, what went wrong? Who went wrong? Who or what or who/what caused the break? Did fate or Providence have a hand in the turn of events?
She prayed for sleep but it refused to get to her. She prayed to Almighty for wisdom to justify her action to herself first. Should money be blamed? No, for Eto met her needs and her life ran on a large dose of contentment with the simplest things of life. Does she need more love? No, for Eto provided more than she needed. May be he fell short in the bedroom? She gave a firm no to such thought because Eto acquitted himself well.
She thought of his interest in her future and her career. During the duration of their relationship Eto took her from high school certificate to a Master degree, trained her in the skill she wanted, and secured a job for her.
She turned her attention to an area which made her turn away the minute it crossed her mind. She took extreme delight in intellectual engagement and Eto had no match. He appeared to have the knack to present a word or a sentence for every intellectual situation. Two of them loved the adjective apropos and used it whenever Eto said something which fitted the situation like words on a scrabble board. With no evident justification for her decision she felt bad enough to consider the possibility of going nuts.
She pressed further and allowed her mind to review her family’s dislike for Eto despite all he did for their daughter and others. She abandoned the thread because her family in all the years gave her no reason for their orientation. They ate, cleaned oil from their lips, but continued to regard the source of food with disdain with nothing to adduce.
She allowed her mind to link her friend Laura to her situation. Laura’s decision to leave certainty for uncertainty bothered her but it made sense the day Lemmy approached and delivered a ‘powerful speech’ which left her bemused. Lemmy and Dase were school mates where she knew him as a carefree young man based, as everyone thought, on his pedigree. He rode a Harley Davidson while at school more for the uniqueness than his family’s inability to buy a car for him. Dase spared no second to consider him for a shot at her heart because she met all her financial needs courtesy of Eto and in any case he made no attempt to date her. When she went to visit her parents and heard Lemmy’s parents met them he laughed but during the night she thought aabout it and found herself interested.
Unable to establish justification she turned her attention to some of the things Eto did which irritated her such as his excessive attention to clean surroundings and insistence she should call him while he called only when serious matters were to be discussed.
Eto disliked and distrusted food cooked outside because of hygiene issues while she liked eating out. Eto’s several minor but worrisome attitudes she once described as a basket of quirks and quiddities but after a time they became part of her life and made him unique and in fact adorable. She sighed when her mind told her the reasons she appeared to desperate to come up with were unacceptable to any right thinking person.
Her mind hit a brick wall when she saw a handwritten word, ‘Calabash.’ A doodle of a native calabash appeared, bobbed up and down, and tilted sideways like the pendulum in a grandfather clock.
Dase wanted to scream but she felt she would increase her nuisance value. She shut her eyes and let more tears pierce through but she sat up and looked around when Lemmy nudged her. In front of her stood Lemmy’s house, a duplex he called Lemmy’s Xanadu to be changed to Dalem’s Chateau to reflect the two names.
Lemmy jumped out of the car and walked to her side of the car. He opened the door and helped her to the ground.
“I am sorry. If you want to go back to him, I can take you there,” he said. She shook her head in the negative, for Eto once said to her, “When you leave, you leave, in fact you had left.”
Lemmy bent, lifted her, and carried her the way a groom carries his bride during a wedding reception. He climbed the three steps to the door, turned the knob, and took her inside. He placed her on the sofa and went to the wine bar to fix a high-alcohol content milk shake which she enjoyed a love-hate relationship with.
Dase took a sip and decided to force herself to conclude a discourse with self. Why did she have to break up the relationship with Eto? The man went the extra mile to satisfy all her needs and she believed she met all her needs. She did look at the relationship as permanent but with the irreversible situation before her she decided to tell herself the truth.
Hate it as she did she accepted the role money played in her decision. Eto strained to provide the most basic things for her and her family but the thought of being in the market for secondes and medium quality cosmetics gave her a sense of discomfort when a better alternative stood before her. What should a rational person do when confronted with two pear tress she can have access to? One has lean and unripe fruits while the other has robust and ripe fruits! The differences were stark with the capacity to place any ordinary person in a cul de sac.
The day before, Lemmy took her out for shopping and what he spent made her dizzy. As heir to a vast financial empire the young man commanded a pull equivalent of the most expensive perfume in the market. Eto ran on potential but actual and potential sometimes run on parallel lanes. To make things worse Eto’s age limited his possibilities to a serious extent. To let Lemmy go would amount to lack of wisdom for no one should expect such young men to stand still like a body of water when they are ready to flow. The line of thought made her squirm as she felt like a gold digger but she agreed on the need to face the truth at some point.
Nor did she feel any better when she recalled a line of thought with respect to her past. When she completed high school and the need to face the world on her own arose, she did ponder the reason men, sometimes of equivalent age and economic status were expected to spend money on women. For seven years she relied on Eto despite the money she made from the skill he sponsored her to learn. She gave such monies to her parents and siblings along with what Eto gave to her to give to them. She shrugged and rationalized it as a product of conventional wisdom and tradition and flowed along.
Other ‘minor’ but major issues bothered her and made her adjust herself several times on the sofa. When their relationship entered the ‘running gear’ phase, Eto sent her monthly lump sum for upkeep but took care of emergencies, health expenses, and school bills. Once in a while if he ran out of cash he would call and request for a ‘loan.’ Based on the legal idea of possession, once money entered her account it became hers which meant request for part of it assumed the status of a loan. Eto would take such monies with profuse appreciation but returned them although without interest.
The issue meant much to Dase because of an unwritten convention in which husbands ‘borrow’ from their wives but in general refuse to pay back. Will Lemmy function in like manner? Will Lemmy let her have access to information on the money he makes? Will she bump into a project at completion or near completion which Lemmy gave her no information on at commencement? What quantum of secrets will Lemmy keep when Eto barred everything except as he once joked, a plan to have a sidekick?
The thoughts made her squirm some more but she justified them. She allowed herself to see Eto’s ways as signposts for her future as a married woman. They should make her value her past and be careful of her present and her future.
Before she slept, her mind told her she has ventured into a new track in life’s race. She found herself unable to determine where the track would lead or end and how it would end. The man she had abandoned as Lemmy put it, she said a prayer for and wished someone who deserves his goodness will take her place and be the partner he hoped she would be.
Back in Eto Villa the man put up his legs on the sofa and sipped champagne from a goblet with no thought of the moment being a celebration for the loss ran deep and left him bemused, because he believed all along Dase would be different. The anticlimactic nature of the break up looked funny.
He knew things will be different when the truth sank in. For the moment his calmness arose from a simple fact – he would no longer sit for hours to paint scenarios in his mind about what their marriage or break up would look like. As to his future with any other female, Eto poured the wine left in the glass down his throat, grimaced, and pushed the thought aside with a hiss.
Follow The Eagle Online Channel on WhatsApp
