Who is now the Ashawo? (2), by Anurika Onyelemelam

They used to pose in national dailies and place their phone numbers for all to see and call.
Hasn’t she heard of taking a horse to the stream, but not being able to force it to drink?
How shortsighted can some people be? I marvelled that she was a graduate. She probably graduated from one of those glorified secondary schools called universities.
I asked her the parameter used in judging and labelling the Page 3 girls ‘whores’.
I asked her if she was a virgin before she got married. I had to ask because she was acting as if she had never seen a guy’s bulala except her hubby’s.
She gave me a nasty look. I told her that she too could be an ashawo married or not if we bother to base our argument on definition.
I checked the dictionary on my own. It says: A prostitute is: “One who solicits and accepts payment for sex acts.”
To me, this means accepting payment for sex could fall under collecting anything from your husband because you want to bang him.
You turn his conjugal rights to your financial exploits. Haba!
Let us use this for the sake of argument. Your husband wants to bang you. You know he wants it real bad. You know the signs. You know those naughty winks. His sexual hunger has been building. He couldn’t wait to get you alone. Then he finally corners you in his bedroom. He got you there under a pretext.
The children are probably watching television.
He wants it.
You could feel his pulsating manhood biting you through the thickness of his trousers. You capitalised on that hunger. Just as he is smooching your neck, caressing and fondling those secret places, you ask him to give you money for the wrappers you bought from Mama Ebuka last month.
Kai! Why then? Couldn’t you have waited until after the show?
I put this analogy across to the lady and she calls it knowing how to get things from your husband.
Knowing his weak point. She sees nothing wrong in asking for material things from her hubby during sexual acts.
Do you agree with her?
How do men feel about it?
Some ladies see some men as being soft where their balls are concerned. For some men, this may be true. Once they want it, they want it. They wouldn’t mind promising the babe heavens, just so they can bury that shaft down her warm cavity.
They think with their balls. With such sexually weak men, taking money from them, in the throes of passion, is as easy as chewing groundnut with popcorn!
But is it a good idea?
Haven’t you noticed the way a guy treats you if you don’t always demand things from him? Respect is earned, not bought.
Try to earn respect from your man. Show him that even if he decides to take a bow and walk out of the relationship today, you jolly well can do without him.
At least financially!
The less you demand, the more he would realise you love him and not his money. And for crying out loud, why ask your guy money in the heat of a bang or when you’re about to start? It kills the fun.
It means you’re equating yourself with the status of a prostitute. Where have all our love and respect gone? Come on sisters, put on your thinking caps!
If you make love with a clause, you make yourself cheap. You’re indirectly telling your partner that he can buy you at a certain price. Allow a guy to get to know you before springing the whole lot of your troubles on him. Have you ever wondered why he picked you among all the other ladies?
Please don’t make him regret picking you. If he truly cares for you, as soon as he gets close to you, he’ll see to those troubles for you. Don’t make him bolt before he knows how special you are.
Don’t make money the corner stone of sex with a partner.
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