It is that time of the year again. The general atmosphere is that of excitement and rush. Even though there is the general complaint of “no money”, there are parties almost every day till the end of the year. That’s not the gist though. I was at an old friend’s party the other day and I noticed this boisterous man.
The man was all over the place, chatting excitedly. I found him rather interesting. We even exchanged a few words.
It wasn’t until he was leaving that I found out that the woman who was sitting beside him was his wife. They barely spoke to each other. As they were leaving though, they were conversing. It was clear there wasn’t any animosity, but there was no affection either.
They both looked to be in their late 40s and early 50s, so it was safe to deduce that they had been together for a while. It is common for couples who have been together for long to lose affection for each other. It takes the conscious effort of both partners to keep the fire burning.
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It is quite easy to spot a couple who aren’t having enough sex. The chemistry is usually off. It shows in the lack of affection. And even when it is forced, it shows. True affection cannot be faked because it flows from the inside out unconsciously.
Here are some signs that show that one isn’t having enough sex:
1. Decrease in Libido: One of the most common signs is a noticeable decrease in your sexual desire. If you find yourself rarely feeling sexually aroused or lacking interest in engaging in sexual activities, it could indicate a lack of sexual satisfaction.
2. Emotional Disconnection: A lack of emotional intimacy or connection with your partner may be a sign that you are not engaging in enough sexual activity. Regular sexual encounters often help foster emotional closeness and strengthen the bond between partners.
3. Increased Stress Levels: Regular sexual activity can be a stress-reliever, releasing endorphins and promoting relaxation. If you notice that you are feeling more stressed or anxious without a clear reason, it could be related to a lack of sexual activity.
4. Strain in Relationship: Insufficient sexual activity can put a strain on your relationship. It may result in frustration, resentment or feelings of dissatisfaction between partners. Regular sexual engagements help maintain a healthy and satisfying relationship.
5. Sleeping Problems: Regular sexual activity may contribute to better sleep quality. The release of certain hormones during sex can promote relaxation and improve your ability to fall asleep and stay asleep. If you are experiencing sleep disruptions, it could be linked to a lack of sexual activity.
6. Decreased Self-Esteem: Sexual activity can have a positive impact on self-esteem and body image. If you are not engaging in enough sexual activity, you may start to feel less desirable or attractive, potentially leading to a decrease in self-confidence.
7. Physical Health Issues: Sexual activity has been associated with several physical health benefits such as improved cardiovascular health, increased immunity and reduced pain. If you notice a decline in your physical well-being without any obvious cause, it could be related to insufficient sexual activity.
8. Increased Fantasising: When not having enough sexual activity, individuals might find themselves fantasising more often about sexual encounters or experiences they desire. This could be a subconscious indicator of unmet sexual needs.
9. Feeling Bored or Unfulfilled: If you feel sexually unfulfilled, bored or stuck in a routine, it may be a sign that you are not engaging in enough sexual activity. Variety and regularity in sexual experiences can help maintain excitement and satisfaction.
10. Lack of Intimacy: Sexual activity is one way to express intimacy and create a stronger emotional bond with your partner. If you notice a lack of emotional connection or intimacy in your relationship, it could be a result of insufficient sexual activity.
11. Increased Frustration or Irritability: A lack of sexual activity can lead to increased frustration or irritability. Sexual release and intimacy can help reduce tension and stress. And when this outlet is absent, it may result in feelings of frustration or irritability.
12. Changes in Overall Well-Being: Regular sexual activity has been linked to improvements in overall well-being. Not having enough sex may lead to a decrease in overall happiness, satisfaction and general contentment in life.
13. Diminished Physical Intimacy: Physical touch and intimacy are important aspects of a sexual relationship. If you notice a decrease in affectionate gestures, cuddling, or non-sexual physical contact with your partner, it could be an indicator of inadequate sexual activity.
14. Lack of Sexual Confidence: When you are not engaging in enough sexual activity, you may experience a decrease in sexual confidence. This can manifest as self-doubt, insecurity, or fear of sexual performance, potentially impacting your sexual satisfaction.
15. Increased Pornography Consumption: If you find yourself relying more heavily on pornography to fulfill your sexual desires, it may indicate a lack of sexual activity in your life. While pornography can be a healthy part of a person’s sexual expression, relying solely on it may be a sign of unmet needs.
16. Sexual Dysfunction: Long periods without sexual activity may increase the risk of sexual dysfunction such as erectile dysfunction for males or difficulties with orgasm for both males and females. Regular sexual activity can help maintain sexual function and alleviate certain sexual problems.
17. Lack of Variety or Spontaneity: When you don’t have enough sex, there is usually no time for exploration or spontaneity in your sexual experience. If your sexual encounters become monotonous or predictable, it may be an indication that you need more sexual stimulation and exploration.
18. Increased Focus on Work or Hobbies: When sexual desires are not being met, people often find themselves diverting their attention and energy toward work, hobbies, or other distractions. It can be a subconscious way to compensate for the lack of sexual activity.
19. Seeking Validation Outside the Relationship: Without adequate sexual satisfaction, it is only expected that one or both partners may seek validation or attention from sources outside their committed relationship. This could manifest as flirting, emotional affairs, or seeking intimacy elsewhere.
20. Lack of Physical Intimacy with Yourself: Masturbation is a natural and healthy expression of one’s sexuality. If you find yourself lacking the desire or motivation for self-pleasure, it could indicate a lack of sexual activity or unmet sexual needs.
It is important to note that sexual satisfaction and needs vary greatly from person to person. What may be considered “enough” sexual activity for one individual may be different for another. Understanding and open communication with your partner about your desires and needs are key to maintaining a fulfilling and satisfying sexual relationship. If you have concerns or questions about your sexual health or well-being, it is advisable to seek professional help.
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