Does a best friend exist? Who is a friend? Why choose one person among the array of friends and call a particular person “best”?
A friend is a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations.
Today the world has become callous and wicked. You need to be sure who you pick and honour as a friend or before you confer the honour on that person as a best friend, be sure the person is not holding a dagger behind or a spear as teeth.
Overtime in life, so many people have been sent to untimely death because of the betrayal from a firm friend whom they thought had their back. Trust has a lot to do in a relationship. Can you attest that the bond you share with your friend, your friend shares similar trust and bond for you? While it is a free world, relationships are heterogeneous and you are free to select that trusted person as your buddy, but ensure your buddy holds your back as your pal.
You can be described as a very bad person by some other associates, but it is very possible for one person to allign with you despite your very bad behaviour. It goes to show that the weight of that bond is lying on that other person who has accepted you for who you are.
As a person you may not be the most patient person, but you can be blessed with a sacrificial pal, who never says no or refuses a request no matter when and how odd you make it. Whenever you find a loyal friend, endeavour to reciprocate their gestures because it takes only an angel to befriend certain people if you have to consider their character.
The traits of a friend are numerous but let me mention a few. Someone compassionate is a good example to make your friend. Age has no restrictions to friendship. The person you chose to be your friend could be a decade ahead or below you. It does not define wisdom or maturity. As a compassionate friend, your duty is to endure all the excesses of your friend. There are times misunderstanding will ensue that, friend never goes, he or she will be the first to try to make up for the fight, quarrel or misunderstanding and even goes ahead to plead for a make up and for peace to reign.
Compassionate people never see failure in their friend. Rather they see your strength and they never lack positive words of encouragement for you. If you are reading me and you have this type of compassionate friend and you are taking the person for granted, kindly draw that person closer and appraise them for being your buddy.
Loyalty cannot be separated from a good friend. These set of friends, for a good number of times, think of the progress and success of their friend. Whatever they have, even their income, they are always willing to divide it and share it with their friend. In their understanding, they believe once life is cozy and comfortable for their pal, it will be positively transferred to them. So this kind of a friend goes all out to keep their friendship with their commitment on loyalty.
Generosity is another type of love that two friends should share. Friendship is symbiotic in nature. There must be something to give. Generosity does not always come across as financial deposits or impacts. It can appear as your attention, your time, helping run errands or filling vacuum where in dire need.
If you are a demanding friend, it means you are not generous. As a generous friend, you need to pay attention to your friend and their likes. Being willing to do the extra things even when it is not convenient will prove your strength of generosity. There are certain people who never give. They have the perception that they are not buoyant or that their friends even have so much so they do not have anything to contribute. Kindly alter such reasoning. As little as volunteering your time to aid your friend is good enough.
There are offensive character that a friend should never have. Never covet the happiness of your friend. If you are a woman, stay away from the spouse, lover or intimate companion of your female friend. That is a boundary. It is called drawing a line. A good friend will not flirt or get loose around their friend’s intimate partner. It is a time bomb. Do not set the gun powder. It will explode. You cannot be nicer to your friend’s spouse than your friend. Get off their happiness, get off their private and love life, get off their man, woman. You are an intruder except your advice or consent is solicited.
Envy is another negative vice. It is better you admire your friend and tell your pal how much you admire whatever your friend has. Talk about what you want from your friend with him or her instead of raging jealousy and plotting an attack on your friend. If you are a jealous friend, it will boomerang against you. Whatever you desire from your friend, tell your pal instead of backstabbing, backbiting or gossiping behind them.
A friend blessed with wealth, will surely remember his or her friends. But the problem most friends have is lack of contentment. You want to become like your friend overnight? It is not possible. Accept the assistance your friend renders and believe that is their best for you.
If you cannot be trusted with your words, then you deserve the type of treatment meted on you from your friends. Borrow means borrow! loan means loan! Return the favour of a borrow or loan. If you hold on to your friends sweat or disrespect them by dribbling them or frustrating to pay back the loan, it goes to tell you are a bad friend, a liar and a cheat, and as time goes on, you will be out of friends because precedent will play against you.
Dear reader, endeavour not to fight with unkind words against your friend. Do not blackmail your friend because of a claim you know them so well. At the expiration of the friendship, make sure you do not start exposing the secret of your friend you knew while the friendship blossomed. If you condescend that low, you are ultimately a cruel person. The future does not foreclose. Friendship can become strained and stressed. Go your separate ways. Time will heal wounds. If maturity can settle scores, you can become better friends again, but never leave a wound. Do not be the source of your friend’s misfortune, death or calamity. There is Karma.
Finally, whoever you have offended, that friend you have taken for granted, look for them, please go back to them and plead for PEACE!
. Lilian Mabeek is a writing enthusiast who enjoys to captivate her readers with everyday happenings or experiences as it best soothes each person, having similar and peculiar reactions and interaction with daily life occurrences. As an inspirational writer focused on indelible prints of positivity of the minds on anyone reading a line or pages as it were, she prefers not to delve into negative stories or publications, but rather intentionally purges the minds of readers to awaken to a beautiful world where endless joy is found and possibilities exist. For Mabeek, her purpose is to bring peaceful memories, coexistence and friendliness to the mind of anyone who reads her daily digest. You can describe her choice of expression as a daily English usage for better comprehension among readers of all educational qualifications. Mabeek’s passion for writing was borne out of ensuring that anyone reading any publication will find pleasure, humour, laughter and an appreciation of whatever is being written about, but ultimately avert stress, anxiety, depression and any form of life challenge. As a social commentator and public relations consultant, for her the pen is a tool to the heart of the society, bringing public enlightenment that it pays to focus on positive narratives and creating a greater image for Nigeria.
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