Friendships grow in time from one stage to another until two people become closer and closer. Not every friendship will reach best friends status, as each friendship is different. Friendship involves making some sacrifices from the people who are involved in order to make them happy as they live.
Friendship is not about the person you have known the longest. It is about the person who came and never left your side. He or she sees the first tears, catches the second, and stops the third. A friend is someone who knows the songs in your heart and sings along when you have forgotten the words.
A friend is more than a person who is willing to take you the way you are. A friend is a person whose acts should result in self-improvement, better attitudes, self-reliance, comfort, consolation, self-respect and better welfare.
Elkanah Glen sees friendship in general as a mutual relationship between two or more people, where the “friends” share a common interest and work towards the fulfillment of such interest. Friendship can also be seen as a ‘ship’ carrying friends to a common destination in terms of sharing ideas, pains, affection and goals.
Friendship, just like any other form of bond, can be lost. For any friendship to be maintained, the parties involved must earn the trust of each other, seek general interest and not just satisfying one’s selfish interest and to be ready to go down with each other even in the darkest hours of life. In fact, one of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood. Whenever any of these is missing in friendship, the true value of such friendship will be lost and the entire friendship may not be maintained.
Friends are important to us. Everyone needs a friend around because no one can accomplish much on his own without depending on a friend for a little boost. Life itself is made up of good times and hard times. Therefore, for you are able to have the total freedom to be yourself, be freely advised justly, assisted readily, be tolerated patiently, and be defended courageously, there must be a true friend around you because only a true friend can bring out the best in you even when you are about giving up.
Yes of course, betrayal can sometimes come from a friend but not true friend, as true friends are prepared to go down with you when all are backing out, tolerate you without knowing and continue with you even when everyone decides to go back. However, when the other party involved allows selfish interests to influence his commitment to the friendship, this no doubt will lead to disloyalty to the other party and consequently leads to end of the friendship in most cases.
On a general note, inasmuch as friends are a necessity, one must be careful in choosing a friend because an insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast. A wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind. Also, you cannot be a friend to all. You will end up nowhere because a friend to all is a friend to none. Just get the one who knows you and love you same.
Ibrahim Musa views true friendship as a total commitment to one another without reservation of any kind, ever willing to share their sorrows and joys. However, a friendship could be a mutual understanding between two or more individuals with similar interest.
I believe in an adage which says make new friends and keep the old ones. I hardly end a relationship. I have maintained relationship right from my primary school to date. To me, once a friend, always a friend and that has been my philosophy in life.
Having friends is very necessary in normal life setting. No right thinking individual will live a normal life all alone without having friends in their lives. A man is not an island. Therefore, there is a need for association, which is a very critical social factor for a normal human development pattern. I sincerely believe that normal people need friends for normal life and therefore friends in one’s life are indeed very necessary.
I believe that betrayal can come from a friend, but depends on who is defining the concept because what a particular individual sees as a betrayal might not be an act of betrayal to another. I have experienced betrayal from those I call friends since from childhood, but that did not make me cut off our friendship, because patience and forgiveness are important virtues in any relationship. This is my personal belief and opinion on the issue and any other person is entitled to his own opinion.
Friendship is must believed it or not. You either have friends and live a normal life or ignore them and live like a virgin Island yet to be explored.
Deborah Douglas sees relationship as: “Whether with the same sex or opposite sex is all about love, care, concern, and willingness to carry each other’s burden and also maintaining the relationship till death, which requires patience.”
I am advising people to be careful in choosing friends. In fact, do not allow friends to choose you but choose friends for yourselves.
Joy Ibrahim views friendship as: “Friends can make you or break you, some friends are more than siblings, because they will be with you through thick and tin; it is about sacrifice and affection. Though, as humans we err but even God forgives us who are we not to forgive our friends. We break up to make up and a wound from a friend they say is more than a thousand kisses from an enemy. When you hold them too tight, you will crush them and when they are held loosely, they will slip away. My advice to friends is to be understanding, tolerant, sincere and be themselves at all times. Do not go out of your way just to please a friend if they do not appreciate it; be person of your words.”
Abigail John is of the University of Maiduguri, Department of Mass Communication, 300 level.
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