An appetizer: in line with karmic retributive dispensation of justice, the immediate-past governor of Abia State, Chief Theodore Ahamefule Orji (jestfully known as Ochendo), cannot escape punishment for his innumerable atrocities and cruelties while in office as his generation/clan are inevitably bound to harvest the whirlwind vicariously, should he miss the reward.
Recently, in a lucid response to a piece of asininity attacking the former governor of Abia State, Dr. Orji Uzor Kalu, by a certain baboon named ‘Koos James’, hacking obviously at the understandable behest of T. A. Orji, one of Kalu’s ungrateful political godsons.
In that feedback, I incontrovertibly asserted that the fictitious name, ‘Koos’, was not an indigenous African name, let alone West African or Nigerian identity. I had thought that the fictive small fry and his serial fictions would not appear again in a respected newspaper like THISDAY. Alas, on August 2, 2015, under ‘Letters to the Editor’, THISDAY, THE SUNDAY NEWSPAPER, this tiny tot of an irritant wrote an imbecilic rejoinder entitled “Abia: The limit of propaganda” which was consigned to the space for letters of belligerence because of its vacuousness. Whenever an opinion material lacks substance, it is usually dumped in such toxic environments, if not dropped!
What I do not comprehend is why the buffoons and mites who write in defence of T. A. Orji swim in cowardice! Why concoct names and affix them to their bizarre contributions to the redemptive battles in God’s Own State? Are they afraid of being exposed and embarrassed in the public domain by the audacious and lethal Kalu Media Team? Let us know the masked deviants who shamelessly write in defence of the second family in Nigeria to be dragged to the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) for fiscal criminalities known to even kindergartners in Abia State! I, personally, need to know these clownish moppets in order to address them properly in my unique style. It is not just a question of coining nomenclatures—let it be brats we already know in or outside T. A. Orji’s wasted government. We need names that the public can readily associate with it or identify at the drop of a hat—not Koos James, Orji Orji or similar insane falsifications for mass deception. Papooses cannot exonerate a bambino.
Some people have expressed astonishment over my persistent emphasis on the leadership tragedy of comical T. A. Orji and counselled me to forget Ochendo and ignore the provocative rantings of the miscreants working for him. It is unfortunate that these well-meaning members of the society who read my unrestrained interventions and implore me to move on with my life do not get to see the multi-media tirades continuously heaped on Dr. Kalu and this writer by cherubs. Most of the distractions are so damning that to turn a blind-eye to such stripling idiocies is to fertilise a cluster nursery of clownishness, deviancy and rascality. Such an idiotic tribe of hacks must be quarantined before the laddies further foul up the atmosphere with their axphyxiative brazenness. I apologize for “torturing” distinguished readers of my racy essays with the effronteries of T. A. Orji and his clan of combative media mercantilists and pugilistic defence mercenaries (names withheld). A rather disappointing note: as long as the oppositional bohemians and urchins in T. A. Orji’s vanishing gang of nippers keep splashing mud on us on paid pages of newspapers, we (the OUK Global Media Team) shall persist in our perpetual counter-ferociousness. We must end T. A. Orji’s festering media insurgency! His media terrorism through sonny accomplices was supposed to have stopped on May 29, 2015.
No amount of informational juvenility, historical obfuscation and cub obscurantism with Germanic deployment of propaganda with which the pseudonymous whippersnipper called Koos James prefaced his infantile letter can save his benefactor from the looming damnation for his heinous crimes against humanity (and God), particularly Abians, between 2007 and 2015. Scampering to the Senate like a yob in controversial electoral circumstances cannot mitigate the eternal punishment that awaits T. A. Orji. Similarly, no degree of media assaults by mods on our principal can deter us in the crusade to rediscover Abia State. Such rocker stunts merely trivialise the grievous issues of misgovernance at stake. For us, unlike our bellicose antagonists, we in the media team of Dr. Kalu do not subscribe to propaganda—which was the official policy of the T. A. Orji inglorious era—we adumbrate verifiable facts and escalate forensic figures. Modern information management has gone beyond dysfunctional dissemination of photoshop spins by skinheads. Such duckling deceits, lies, dubiosities, duplicities and deception that hallmarked worst governance and sign-posted poverty of leadership in Abia State from 2007 to 2015 no longer make sense in this age.
In the situation that Abia State has found itself, we should not be talking of the abysmal image of the immediate-past governor who clinically ruined the state. The challenges that confront Abians demand confession, restitution and atonement for the ruination and rape of Abia by just one family! Of what use is questionable reputation or perception of an individual in the face of retrogression institutionalized by that person between 2007 and 2015? The kernel of the matter is how and why a couple and their son now on the run over local government funds domesticated the fortunes of their state. Begging the question as a media warfare tool has become preposterous, mechanistic and puerile.
Let us go back to school for the sake of mongrelous Koos James. One of his rascalities advertises his blissful ignorance: “After all, he who pays the piper dictates the tune.” Ask anyone outside the T. A. Orji camp, our own boss, the potential FIFA president, does not call (not dictate, as used by the ignoramus tagged Koos James) the tune. This is free lesson number one. It is stupidity on the part of this particular hireling of T. A. Orji to think that a strategist like me working as the Media Adviser to Dr. Kalu will be prospecting on barrenness or charity! If I am looking for such deployments of my cerebral endowments, I know where to go. Intellectualism attracts reward most times. Photoshop propaganda inevitably requires calling of the tune and could be done freely or for peanuts because there are no professionalism, ethics, core principles, integrity, diligence, candour, maturity, responsibility and God’s fear! I am very certain that if I get to know who this Koos James is, one of my copious personal engagements outside official relationships with Dr. Kalu will pay him handsomely unlike the periodic and wretched bloody handouts from Ochendo! True. I am not kidding.
Another stupefactious manifestation of the T. A. Orji media charlatanism is that the toddlers keep parroting the same sterile information from year to year due to exhaustion of the vicious fabrications in their specious armoury. One of such brainwaves is the repetition of the purported dismantling of Dr. Kalu’s political dynasty. What kind of ludicrous interjection is this? Between Dr. Kalu and his amnesic and colourless successor in Government House, Umuahia, who has greater political influence at home and nationwide? Which political structure did T. A. Orji bring down? From where to where? Does Ochendo look like someone who has the temerity, capacity and competency to hamstring Dr. Kalu’s political flourish in any way other than exclusive electoral fraud perpetrated with the fleeting power of incumbency? This election fraud, institutional power drunkenness and surrogacy were nurtured by protection from the former First Lady, Dame Patience Jonathan, on grounds of spousal familiarity. Where was T. A. Orji in 1998 when Dr. Kalu donated N500 million to the formation of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP)? Whoever heard of T. A. Orji before Dr. Kalu brushed him up in 1999 and catapulted him to relevance and recognition? Even if, as the disjointed tale goes, T. A. Orji negligibly assisted Dr. Kalu to become governor in 1999, so what—will that be the first happenstance in the country’s political history? Was it not based on the much-touted assistance that Dr. Kalu made him Chief of Staff and regrettably enthroned him, unilaterally, as the worst governor in the annals of Nigeria? Who in this nation does not know that Dr. Kalu has greater political value and utility than his foremost political godson? In fact, there is no platform for comparison. It is only inebriacy that could give rise to such an obstreperous depravity of pitting the two Orjis for any contest.
Back to the offensive letter: “Today, the state has been freed from the stranglehold of a mother-Excellency who hitherto held the state hostage. If the troubles of Abia State are as popular and relevant as envisioned by Wabara in his imaginary world, how come (sic) Orji Uzor Kalu has lost elections on the two occasions he contested for Abia North Senatorial seat?” It is for Abians to make a preference between the mythical “mother-Excellency” and the reality of the nuisance called “Ikuku” who, amid transient and illegal power intoxication, was inimical and squandered public funds more than all the past administrators and governors put together!
Pig-headed Koos and his sponsors should know that losing elections in highly flawed polling processes is not significant—even in standard polls. Most of the elections in Abia State this year were massively rigged and are subjects of litigation at various levels of adjudication, including majorly the stolen mandates of Dr. Kalu and that of the governorship candidate of the All Progressives Grand Alliance (APGA), Dr. Alex Otti, who is deservedly awaiting the revalidation of his victory. I am sure this rascally bloke nomenclatured Koos is unaware of the electioneering full-page petition by the three senators from Abia State against T. A. Orji shortly before the same senatorial election that was manipulated against Dr. Kalu. Is this deranged letter writer also aware that N6.7 billion was splashed on the governorship and senatorial polls in the state to ensure that favoured candidates of the establishment won? For anyone to gloat over the thievish outcome of last elections in Abia State is to suffer from cancerous debility that culminates in aggravated amnesia associated with senility. Luckily, we are not yet dealing with gerontocratic elements. This piece of information from an unknown source should interest all the haters of Dr. Kalu who maliciously poke at him in utter ignorance: “President Muhammadu Buhari is the 4th elected president in the 4th Republic after his 4th attempt (emphasis mine) and was declared winner in the 4th month of the year!” We all know the story of J. F. Kennedy of USA. With these two props, I rest my submission on the electoral fortunes of Forbes’ billionaire and one of the 50 richest men in Africa.
Still on the vexatious letter by Koos: “…we (what is the devilish constitution of this ‘we’?) re-emphasise that as governor, Orji Uzor Kalu inflicted on the state a crushing debt burden in excess of N55 billion.” Ever since Prof. Herbert Orji in his professorial naivety from the blues gave out this spurious figure in a newspaper interview as Dr. Kalu’s debt profile while in office (which I replied via a highly inflammable full-page publication), famished messengers of T. A. Orji have been foolishly rehashing the illogical figure without caring a hoot about the fallacy. Why did the tepid government of T. A. Orji not publish the details of this debt, especially in a situation where the accused insists that he did not leave any debt for his successor? Indeed, the issue should be the deployment of such money if indeed it was incured. For purposes of argument, there is hardly any former governor who never left a conflagration of debt. Government is a continuum and should not be treated like capsules. In the case of T. A. Orji, he did not only leave staggering debts, but owed stupendous salaries, allowances, pensions, gratuities and sundry emoluments and entitlements—which Dr. Kalu never did as evidenced by official records. During Dr. Kalu’s tenure, lawyers never went on strike endlessly all through the years just as civil servants and staff of tertiary institutions never experienced systemic backlogs of unpaid wages.
Yet another bileful extract: “Kalu’s poisoned chalice on account of his corruption trials by the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) makes him the least qualified to pontificate on corruption.” This case is in court in Abuja and cannot be subjudiced here as our attackers routinely do. The circumstantial witch-hunt of Dr. Kalu by Baba Iyabo using the instrumentality of the EFCC is known even to children still in their mothers’ diapers! Former EFCC boss Nuhu Ribadu has gloriously and commendably confirmed this vindictive aspect of the Ota farmer. Dr. Kalu boldly contributes to anti-corruption crusades because of his convictions and intolerance for graft. His avowals on sleazy ex-governors are testimonious to his integrity. If you are not clean, you cannot fault swindles involving public officials. You cannot advocate equity with unclean hands. Enough of these EFCC moonlight tales by rambunctious hypercritics of the Pillar of Sports in Africa.
Finally from the diatribe under focus: “In concluding this viewpoint, Abia State is on the path to development and progress today because the government has found its bearing to the credit of Theodore Orji. History will be kind to him for extricating the state from the strangehold of vicious godfathers. The era in which the relations of Orji Uzor Kalu and his hirelings held sway in the Government House in protection of the narrow selfish agenda of a vicious cabal is gone forever.” This Koos must be living in the moon to affirm that Abia State is on the path to development and progress to T. A. Orji’s credit! Is the ragamuffin aware that the state under the leadership of his employer was the worst in the country in terms of development and good governance? Prince Arthur Eze confirmed this publicly not long ago. Other eminent Nigerians at one point or another held the same view like the multi-billionaire Koos and his fellow gangsters should go to Katsina State and behold the credible legacies of the immediate-past governor, Dr. (Barrister) Ibrahim Shehu Shema. After T. A. Orji purportedly extricated the state from the stranglehold of vicious godfathers (veiled and dastardly pluralism for Dr. Kalu), what happened thereafter? By the way, what kind of stranglehold is this yarn in a regime of executive governance? This old wives’ tale smacks of absurdity! Did Ochendo not leave the state in unprecedented and unparalled ruins years after the mirage of extrication from Dr. Kalu’s suffocative tendencies and godfatherly presumptions? Which combination of relations and hirelings of Dr. Kalu will be worse than Ikuku in the history of Abia State? For eight years, this young man ran the state aground while his father haplessly and forlonly watched sleepily with hands folded like when his compromised police agents from the Abia State Police Command handcuffed me last year on frivolous, barbaric and illegal charges consummated in the ghastliness of abduction!
When cometh the next diseased mind and inebriate joker in the genre of a certain Koos James? My team awaits you!
. Wabara (ewabara@yahoo.com/08055001948) is the media adviser to Dr. Orji Kalu.
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